Hey, kids! This month instead of one relatively large and interesting site review, FuKuteers Ethrin and Taiki will be tackling a few small sites that are sources of various fan-produced masturbatory maladies: Fan-fiction, fan-posted image-boards, and eerie otaku-produced OS-mascot creepiness! Enjoy!

August, 2004's Fucking O-Link-u! Honoree #1:
 The Shoujo-Ai Archive

Welcome to the web's premiere website for lesbian anime ("shouji-ai" or "yuri") fanfiction! Now, Yaoi and Yuri FnO can be easy targets, but the real comedic gems here (aside from the massive 51-chapter lesbian crossover fics and the manifestation of the Suu/Ed connection from Val's Love Hina article) come from the forums. Field reporter taiki uh... reports:

Decency is often a subjective thing. On the forums at http://www.shoujoai.com/, it's a fucking lost cause. Most of the boards there are relatively nice, if Fucking Otakuish, but there's one board there that's so fucking horrible, I'm surprised it hasn't made Something Awful's Weekend Web.

The Board I speak of, is the 'hentai images and discussion board.' Access to this board requires registration and to have it enabled. For good fucking reason. Now. I'm going to come out here and say that yes, I have posted really embarassing shit here, but there's something comforting about knowing that you're not the world's lonliest, most desperate serial masturbator in the world. Check out this thread, "Incest, ever done it?" It was these types of threads that really made me ponder the nature of my sexuality.

It's amazing. Sexual deviants of all kinds, and Fucking Otaku STILL can't reproduce. I wondered this myself, and realized they're posting on a web board dedicated to LESBIANS. ROUND PEG, SQUARE HOLE. HELLO?! IS ANYONE LISTENING?! It took me 5 long years to learn that lesson. Sorry kids, not everyone can be a Holden McNeil.

After reading such gems as, "Ultimate Lolicon Collection" and "Beastiality, Ever done it?" I cut and run. A part of me died there. Another part of me was left to wonder, "Whatever happend to good old American perversions such as the good old Dirty Sanchez and Cleveland Steamer?" All I know is, if you ever meet anyone from that board, I'd suggest that you run and cover your ass. Bridget has made them all gay, it seems.

~taiki

August, 2004's Fucking O-Link-u! Honoree #2:
 LoLiMaster's NJoy MOEBoard

Image-posting boards are a common source of fantertainment, even (or perhaps especially) when they are non-pornographic, going against the tide of inevitable adult posts. Fukuteer Ethrin reports:

*** WARNING: Moe board is an image posting BBS. While "Extremes Sexual (Hardcore)" and "Real photos" are forbidden by MB's admin, this board may contain non-workplace-safe images! Also, a lot of the pictures are absurdly high resolution. If you dare to go, expect pagesto take a while to load. ***

Basically, a lot of this crap.

For those of you who thought that last month's o-link-u wasn't sick enough, this month, I bring you Moe Board, the perpetually updated provider of softcore(?) sometimes-lolita otaku jerkoff material, fan-posted, if not produced. This Korean-run board is teeming with fan service-y images that rile the uptight and just nauseate the rest of us. (Hey, aren't those Koreans the epitome of evil to most English speaking Otaku creeps we complain about over here?)

This php-driven cesspool has a freakishly "appropriate" tiled background image of a little topless girl. Of course.

But this site isn't the only place where the romantically challenged can look for some virtual rays of sunshine in their otherwise cloudy lives. Sites like Moe Board are really a dime a dozen. It wouldn't be fair to single out Moe Board without giving any sort of pot shots to 2Chan and its ilk. Hey, at least Moe-board doesn't have a guro section...

~Ethrin

August, 2004's Fucking O-Link-u! Honoree #3:
 OS-tan Collection

Last but not least is the OS-tan Collection, where Japanese otaku make their favorite operating systems into sexy fanservicing mascots. I'm not kidding, here. Fukuteer Ethrin reports:

Oh, XP-tan, you're so hot, I'd download your service pack ANY day!

A lot of people stereotype the Japanese into making everything some form of cute. From Hello Kitty "fine point massagers" to more mundane objects like pens, looking at the merchendising shops, one would think that just about everything in Japan is freaking cute. 
Or, we can wonder, what the hell haven't Otaku over there sexualized? You can now cross personal computer operating systems off that list. Windows ME, which brought upon many a headache and is considered one of the worst OSes ever concieved is now an air-headed, moe-tastic little girl that puts cans of Dr. Pepper in the microwave. (Don't you want to do this
sometimes?)

ME is joined by other editions of Microsoft's windows(even betas!) as well as numerous other popular operating systems.
(Linux gets a rather gruesome representation while OSX has an Eva moment (above).

There's a lot of content on this site, images in paticular. Some of the art work belongs to the site owner while other items are gifts or visitors submitting their own colorings of the line drawings people posted. As one would expect, there is a collection of pornographic pictures.

~Ethrin

Well, that's it for our three briefer-than-usual forays into some slightly disturbing fan-produced crap from otaku in three different countries (and probably a whole host more, WORLD WIDE WEB and all...)! Special thanks to taiki and Ethrin for their investigative "journalism." Until next time, keep masturbating to that sexy Windows XP mascot, computer-using loners, but try to boost my hit count while you're at it, k?

~Chiriko